Don’t Just Salvage Your Relationship—Recreate It! by Leon F. Seltzer.
Consider that when a relationship is failing, it’s primarily because you’ve both become polarized in your thinking—which can best be characterized as self-righteous and critical. As a result, much of your respect for each other has atrophied. So can you perceive your partner in a fundamentally different (and far more positive) light? However hurtful or inconsiderate you may feel they’ve been to you, can you see them as essentially well-meaning—that their reactions to you may represent something other than unacceptable flaws in their character? For regaining respect for your partner is pivotal if your relationship is going to have a fresh chance at success. Your self-justifying perceptions of them degraded your respect for them in the first place. So is there a way you could more benignly reperceive their motives, so you might feel less animosity toward—or alienation from—them?